"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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