You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
