What did we do last night that was yellow?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
you inspire me to be a worse person
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
