Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
