Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
