I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize
