New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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