used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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