Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
