My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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