If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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