so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Randomize
