Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
