We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize