There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I believe in your delicious
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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