dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize