normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
