Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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