What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
