Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Is Oprah even human
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
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