sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
