Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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