More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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