I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Randomize
