he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
We are all done wearing pants today
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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