he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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