I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
