I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
