Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
