i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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