Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
