they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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