$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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