Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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