Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
