so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
There r osticjed everywhere
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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