And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
