i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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