Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
