We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Randomize
