I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Randomize
