I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
