i barfeds in our rink
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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