Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
two words: eviction party
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Randomize
