my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
