Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
