You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Randomize
