I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
we should paint friendship bongs
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