Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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