I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
