don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize