We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Everclear isn't food dammit
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
